lol it open

Since the area ahead seems to be very menacing, I suppose it's time to introduce our story proper.

You are ANDY SPIFF, you collect TOY PONIES, make a world class BOWL OF CHILI, and curate a LARGE LIBRARY OF OBSCURE AND/OR NOVELTY MUSIC. You are a planetary delivery boy, delivering packages from THETAZON, an all-consuming galactic corporation that will sell literally fucking anything. Right now you are lost though because you can't remember where or why or how here be.